Men Are Just Happier People--
our last name stays put.
The garage is all ours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
we can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell us the truth.
The world is our urinal.
we don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
People never stare at our chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle our feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
we know stuff about tanks and engines.
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
we can open all your own jars.
we get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
our underwear is £5.50 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
we are unable to see creases in our clothes.
Everything on our face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You own one wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
we can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
we have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
we can do Christmas shopping for 24 relatives on 24th December in 24 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
it always makes me laugh whenever i hear a bloke with a spanner/screwdriver saying "righty tighty, lefty loosey" 
